May 11, 2012 10pm
Today was one of the hardest days I’ve had all year. I have never gotten lower than a b on a piano test and on my final I got an F! Once I got to our last training and preparation meeting at 4:30 it was just me and Christine and she asked me how my day was and I just broke down crying. I have been sleep deprived trying to pack up my apartment, trying to pack for Guatemala AND try to study and practice for finals. And to have it end with an F on my final, unsure of how that would affect my final grade, I couldn’t hold it in anymore and I just let go. It was actually a really interesting way to start this trip prep time. Christine was really excited because I was showing emotion and actually crying instead of pretending like I was okay. That is my normal reaction to things and this semester has been spent attempting to be open and real with people. So I suppose this is a huge break through. So spiritually and emotionally thi has been a productive semester. Now I am just hoping that my grades follow suit. I dot want to be distracted thinking about my grades while I am in Guatemala. I am praying for peace and focus right now. God grant me your mind and focus my eyes to the needs of your people.
May 11, 2012. 1 am
I’ve bought a journal to bring to Guatemala. Im not usually much of a journalar but I feel God already starting to move in me as I prepare and want to document everything I see hear smell and experience while I am in country.
We leave in a little less than 30 hours. I’m not really sure what to expect but I am excites to see what God does in and through this team. It is hard knowing thtbi am going to have to rely so heavily on people I honestly don’t know to well but I know God will help me overcome my issues with needing absolute control in all situations.
Not only is this the night before my trip but it is also the last night I will be spending in my apartment. I am really sad because my amazing room mate Angelika will be moving back to Austria but at the same time I am really excited to say I finished my first year at the University of New Orleans. Also I am really stoked that next semester I will be meeting new room mates, and living on the 3rd floor so I won’t be dealing with the clog dancers that lived above me this year, nor will I be getting all of the roaches. HALLELUJAH, AMEN!!
It is unreal how this has all come together. It is unreal how God has changed my mind set and attitude just in the preparation for this trip. I can’t wait to see his faithfulness even more.
So there have been many many wonderful things.
I have been home from Guatemala a sufficient amount of time to have finally gotten my thoughts together and processed the information in the journal I was keeping through out the trip. I will be posting one post for every day we were there starting from the night before. So keep following and I hope the story I lived through the people and the country inspire you and move you to action where ever it is God is or has placed you. God bless.